This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
