ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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