we have pet lesbian snakes
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize