idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
