How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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