dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
