All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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