my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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