But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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