We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize
