My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
