I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
