Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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