you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
my being single is dangerous.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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