no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
