it's not cheating when I paid for it
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
