I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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