i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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