Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
