Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Let the clothes fall where they may.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
