She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
