I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
