her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
