Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
