Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
