why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
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