i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
