She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
