So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize