i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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