How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
