he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
