I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Randomize
