Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
