Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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