He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize
