hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Randomize
