You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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