You're so nebulous sometimes
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
