its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
It was confusing and full of hummus
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
