okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
