I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
