ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
