What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
