she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize