Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
