so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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