Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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