everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
