from now on my penis is your penis
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
