My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Randomize
