i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Randomize
