singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
